after our “outing” at the zoo crowbar agreed to come with me to the opera. I rush to the ticket booth before crowbar can make a scene (he had brought his cardboard “mobile-home” with him…). I quickly find our seats. Crowbar seems to be interested enough to get out of his box and take his seat. The opera begins
(Hubris next to crowbar in a crowded theatre… theatre):
Crowbar: Huubris… this is really dull… there is not even piles of trash to make the stage look pretty.
Crowbar: … … … … … … … …
opera singer: (in french of course) “Living is my hearts fondest desiiiire!! The display of art and the wonder of composition and expression bring me such joooooyy!!”
Crowbar: Hoobris is it Inter-… innert… i-in-.. that thing you told me about where the boring stops and i can eat out of their trash before i have to be tortured again, yet?
opera singer (ablaze): aaaaaahhhhhh!!! * sprinklers *
Crowbar: Oh look the operaah is over now. that burning person was my favorite.
Hubris: * electrified + sprinklers + Hubrissness *(instant death punch) Oh …Ooops.
after the first act and crowbar still hasn’t done anything though. maybe he is actually enjoying th- nevermind. I’ve seen this opera before and the main actress definitely does not fall unconscious and dive from the second story window head-first into her lovers arms.
“Crowbar. I can’t help but think that you had something to do with that last scene.”
“Well she didn’t really expect him to come to her did he?”
this is not going to end well.
(in french) “Oh my love your passion waxes strong to fling thyself from thy perch!”
“but alas, your eyes have closed! Oh what feelings must have wrought upon your heart! to faint in my waiting arms!”
An amazing save! I wonder how they’re going to follow up though. * thud *
“really crowbar? him too?”
- enter the rival in love * “aha! the object of my desire and the object of my scorn both fallen before me! I shall cleave to the one and cleave into the other!”
Even the guy from off stage eh? This is getting interesting. The band suddenly begins playing a rather different tune as this unfolds. looking toward the orchestra, i notice the flames… the director is flailing wildly and throwing the orchestra into… chaos? not so much. The tempo has raised and the beat really began picking up but it’s the same song. more actors frantically enter the stage as if to answer the music.
“Knave! unhand that man!”
“Foul lecher Keep thy lust far from my daughter!”
It’s going to be a battle. The set begins to burn. surrounded by climbing flames the actors engage in pitched combat to the raucous tune of the now-less-frantic director. The actors are armed with some strange props for combat scene though (lack of such props for such a situation in an opera with no actual combat planned is to be expected i suppose). Actors begin smashing flower pots over each other and throwing silverware. one man even rides a fake horse onto the stage as if he’s charging (the horse being two men in a suit) with a lamp post as his lance. All this chaos amongst the flames. It was beautiful. I move to get out of my seat.
“It’s just a play Hoobris, besides it’s almost over.”
the opera still has two more parts.
- blast *
In a huge wave of force, the actors are all thrown from the stage into the audience. unconscious… I’ve gotta see what they come up with after that. A young boy now steps out onto the destroyed set.
“Is there any doubt that the most destructive and violent force in this world is that hurricane of the human soul?”
I give it an eight out of ten. But what could you expect on such short notice.